Saturday, September 3, 2011

The secret to an easy life

I haven’t even really started blogging, and I’m already writing less.

I apologize for that.

The reason for flying under the online radar these days is that I took a forced trip to hell and back – and they’re still having difficulties with their internet connection down there.

OK, fine, I’m exaggerating. It’s just that work has been insane for the last couple weeks. In fact, it has been so for the last couple of months. I never thought I would ever put up with so much work, uncertainty or pressure. It turns out the old saying is true: we have no idea what we can do until we kinda have to.

I was microns away from quitting these days so many times that I stopped counting. I can’t take full credit for ending up not doing it. A few cool, level-headed and genuinely supportive people around me had something to do with my still receiving a paycheck, and I am grateful to them for that.

As the smoke cleared at the end of each day, I realized something.

I wanted to quit because things got tough. I was just refusing to deal with difficult situations. I was afraid I would fail. I wanted things to be easy.

I’ve been waiting for life to get easier for soo long.

And then it hit me. This is it! Life is tough by definition, for everyone. It will always be so, no matter who we are and what we are doing. The secret to an easy life is that it does not exist. I don’t care if you’re an entrepreneur or a corporate employee, senior management or washing toilets. You may be rich or poor, single or married, young or old, it really makes no difference. It is tough. Some days it will be harder than others. Add this carefully to your core script: the easy life so many of us keep waiting for won’t happen.

So I’m changing my approach. I’m living more now than in an unrealistic future or an idealized past. I’m learning and growing and experimenting and fighting and accepting and moving forward. I’m letting go of whatever I ever though my life should be like. Things are what they are, and I am working with whatever life throws at me.

When things are tough (which is like, uhmm, most of the time), we can flee, crash or stretch. Let’s choose the later.


  1. the way I deal with it is the following: I do only what I can do, I focus only on the important stuff; ofc this affects the quality of my work==> bad year reviews==> lot of frustration and so on.

    The Q is: do you like what you do? because if you like only the paycheck behind, it will hit you sooner or later. I was able to do that when I was 30, telling that this is how the life is supposed to be, but when I turned 35 , it just hit me: no, this is not what life has to be, life should pleasure inside the work. Funny isn't it? when we grow up we become childish, or by the contrary - more mature? to realize your turning 40 and 50 and your life is no more than an exotic vacation once a year - it's pretty sad. So I am coming back to my question: do like what you do? are you pasionate about it?

    I am not, and no, it's not that I am saying that because I scared the huge amount of work and pressure and stress, but because I simply do not like it, it has no internal meaning to me, it gives me no satisfaction ( ok, money does not count)

  2. So, what I have come to realize by now is that life is not easy, effort and work is still there, but when you like what you do, it is not called work but fun and passion. It's something that keeps me alive:)

    By the way, I didn't have the chance to thank you for the tonny robbins link, very interesting and inspiring. Is the any way I can consult a Romanian career development consultant to identify the direction, do you know somebody... because I am kinda of lost:)

  3. A, I completely agree, we need to find meaning in our work, the days when the job was just a way to earn money are long gone. I do enjoy my work, I sincerely believe it has a positive impact on people's lives. The post was basically about me finding a new strategy for coping with stress.

    I'm glad you liked Tony Robbins, I really like him too :). As for good career counsellors, no idea, but I'll be glad to read all about your experiences in this respect.

    Thanks for reading and commenting, have a good Sunday!

  4. I'm glad you posted that comment on my blog because this little place of yours is lovely and it's now sitting comfortably in my reader. You make Bucharest sound like New York!
    Regarding your post, I'm young, can i still dream of an easy life? Please...

  5. Ionut, you are very kind, thank you! You are also my first follower, congrats! (virtual champagne bottle popping)

    Fine, dream away, but mark my words and read them again on your 30th birthday, okay? :)